i blew it!

30 06 2010

My front door is wide open. A repairman has been walking in and out it while he fixes some moulding in my kitchen and wouldn’t you know it, Samuel noticed, and called my name from the driveway.

“Did you like those books I left you?” he shouted from 15 feet below. I stammered, feeling ambushed and told him I hadn’t looked through them yet. It wasn’t a lie, I haven’t looked through them, but why why WHY didn’t I ask him what the EFF he was thinking leaving me a gift like that? It was awkward. I couldn’t just yell a conversation about sex books with neighbors and strangers and my 8-fingered repairman all within earshot, but I should have walked downstairs and talked to the guy!

As soon as I realized what I’d blown, I hurried down to “grab my mail” hoping to catch my neighbor out in the shared area where the mailboxes are. I wanted to ask Samuel, straight up, why he chose to leave me a book of erotic fiction, what made him think that I would be into that, and what response had he hoped to elicit. However, he wasn’t there. No dice. I blew it.

When I started this blog, I planned to get bold, to go big and ask men uncomfortable questions so as to get to the bottom of exactly why I’m Stella Lone. And I did…like, once. If this stupid Samuel situation benefitted me in any way at all, it’s in reminding me that with nothing ventured, there is nothing gained. No one’s trying to give me answers to questions I’m afraid to ask, so I gotta go out and start asking them…Starting tonight, at a live music lounge in Hollywood.  I’ll let you know how it goes.

Oh, and btw, I just found out Samuel fell out with the landlady. He’s moving the first of next month.

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2 responses

30 06 2010
Shannon of ** Happiness Is...**

Samuel probably left your landlady sex books too!

20 08 2010
happenstances and second chances « why won't you date me?

[...] 2010 So my creepy neighbor once left me a really inappropriate gift. Days later, I blew my only chance to call him on it…or so I [...]

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